"IT'S FOR THE CHILDREN!" <sob>

If that doesn't work, some concerned parent bitching to the local papers might be another lever, but I'm betting the ETS office will probably know how to proceed.
I figured you'd checked since you'd mentioned PBXs in the original post, but then again, I also know how many times I've missed the obvious, resulting in a Homer Simpson patented forehead slap and "D'Uh!"
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