Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

[Lowie]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

It's like... you can more or less tell what the senders are trying to say if you work at it just a little. But it comes across as patently fake and silly. I can't see what their reasoning is. It sure makes for some unintentional hilarity.

It does tend to be a rather amusing by-product of direct translation from Cyrillic based text. What can be flowing and poetic is often butchered and non-sensical after translation. Throw regional colloquialism into the mix and it's doomed to failure. Or great humour, depending your point of view.

This of course is in no way insinuating that a vast proportion of spam is generated in Slavic regions. Faux capitalism has brought great wealth. Wealth combined with connections of old brings far reaching power. I of course am not in fear of this power. But to be safe, ummm, no insinuation going on here.....

[sintax_error]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

quick skim through spam folder revealed these subjects:

"Making like steel manhood yours."

and

"Try free for best v1agra on the net. Natural our product"

As well as an interesting opportunity to make some money for myself from a young man of the South African Air Force. He was working with NASA, but is now bed-ridden and dying in the Martian Capital of Zhwrong. Turns out his Martian surgeons are unable to operate on the ruptured uterus he suffered when ambushed by a group of rebel Klingons. Nice guy, he says that if I help get his fortune to a church, I can keep 30%.

[streaker69]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

As well as an interesting opportunity to make some money for myself from a young man of the South African Air Force. He was working with NASA, but is now bed-ridden and dying in the Martian Capital of Zhwrong. Turns out his Martian surgeons are unable to operate on the ruptured uterus he suffered when ambushed by a group of rebel Klingons. Nice guy, he says that if I help get his fortune to a church, I can keep 30%.

That story would be perfectly believable except everyone knows that the Martian capital is K'Glork'kkan.

[TheCotMan]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

That story would be perfectly believable except everyone knows that the Martian capital is K'Glork'kkan.

Yes, but if you put inflection in the wrong place it translates to, "There still aren't enough urinals."

Additional material on this topic. Notice how they violate the rules on urinal selection? Is that dangerous?

[Melesse]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

"Dream to be a hero, in her bed?"

Maybe the sender isn't sure if you're going to be using your massive tool in a male or a females bed, hence the question mark. And if you want to be a hero, you should probably work on marksmanship or kung fu. I didn't realize that sexual prowess was directly equivalent to saving lives. I actually prefer the term "orgasm technician."

"Enhancing your rod will be the best gift for her for St. Valentine’s."

Oh truly. My wife prefers getting reamed out by massive wangs on the most romantic day of the year. How is it going to be enhanced, b/c I have dreamed of having a prehensile penis FOREVER!

"The longer your instrument is the more power it has"

Are you selling me telescopes or rifles?

"You hate your male friend? After enlargement it can become your best friend."

If I hated him before, why would I like him more when he's bigger? Now John won't fit in my car anymore, he's always knocking shit over in my house with his big ass, and he eats me out of house and home when he comes over!

"Every woman will find it hard to let you go if you enlarge your tool."

Cause it's stuck in there. You're going to need to go to the hospital to get it removed.

"How many orgasm can man do?"

Usually one at my age, sadly. More when you're younger or more turned on. Why are you asking me anyways?

"For humping-mania"

I used to have that affliction. Wellbutrin cured it. Is it similar to Hulkamania?

[streaker69]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

Is it similar to Hulkamania?

Yes, but if it turns green when it gets enlarged then you might have another much more serious problem.

[sintax_error]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

Yes, but if it turns green when it gets enlarged then you might have another much more serious problem.

That would indeed be a pickle... yeah, a pun. We still need a urinal Czar to increase the number of urinals in public restrooms, though. That or sinks closer to the edge of the counter.

[barry99705]

Re: Vulnerability in the allocation of urinals

According to etiquette if one urinal, the end urinal, is in use, thou shalt utilise the urinal at the opposite end of the installation. What does one do when this urinal is of the half height child / midget kind?

You pee on your shoes.....