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Are there any +1's that are going that may not be as interested in all of the events

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  • Are there any +1's that are going that may not be as interested in all of the events

    Ok, so that title kindof sucks but it's the best that I could come up with (and I've been working on it for a while). Short story, this is my first Defcon and my wife is coming with (2 reasons, first we don't get time without the kids very often and two I require adult supervision, possibly not in that order). The plan at this point is for her to hang out with me in some of the villages and then spend a large chunk of time by the / a pool not watching kids and perhaps enjoying an adult libation or two. This got me wondering if there were other wives (my apologies if that sounds misogynistic / sexist / etc., that's not the intent) that may be going that may not be as interested in talks, etc. and if there were any activities (DC related or otherwise) that I could tell her about. I exercised some search foo in the forums and didn't spot anything but that may simply mean that my search foo needs work.
    .: This post contains 100% recycled electrons :.

  • #2
    It has come up before with names like "The DEF CON Wives Club" which received commentary about sexism, and then later revisions to "DEF CON Sig-O meet"" or something equally generic to cover any kind of relationship(s).

    Historically, the end conclusions have been:
    * Why not involve them in DEF CON, there is probably something they will enjoy
    * The Sig-O tend to have more differences than similarities in interests.

    There have also been other proposals for DEF CON people to watch each others kids, but that has always ended with conclusions that it is a terrible idea, and people are better off either ivolving kids in DEF CON, or leaving kids at home, or using a licensed care provider with good history in Las Vegas.

    Don't let this stop you from seeing if others would like to try it now, but accept it is possible that some of the same problems suggested before may still exist today. Maybe you can chart a path that resolved those issues.

    HTH,
    -Cot
    Last edited by TheCotMan; August 4, 2015, 00:49.

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    • #3
      Kindof dig the 'DEF CON Wives Club", but I've never bothered to purchase a ticket on the PC train :). The plan, so far, is for her to come to DC101 and we're going to plot a course through the con and try to find as much as we can do together but there are a few things that she's made clear that she wasn't interested in. I figured that there may be others in the same boat and thought that I'd toss it out there. If that's the case, there will likely be a sizable contingent of people around a / the pool reading books in solitude while their other / better halves are sitting in a talk next-door. If they know that said contingent exists, they could all get together and enjoy their solitude and adult libations together :).

      Now, for my selfish motivations. If my +1 meets other +1's the chances of my first DEF CON not being my last DEF CON goes up.</ selfish motivation>
      .: This post contains 100% recycled electrons :.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by sainate View Post
        Kindof dig the 'DEF CON Wives Club", but I've never bothered to purchase a ticket on the PC train :). The plan, so far, is for her to come to DC101 and we're going to plot a course through the con and try to find as much as we can do together but there are a few things that she's made clear that she wasn't interested in. I figured that there may be others in the same boat and thought that I'd toss it out there. If that's the case, there will likely be a sizable contingent of people around a / the pool reading books in solitude while their other / better halves are sitting in a talk next-door. If they know that said contingent exists, they could all get together and enjoy their solitude and adult libations together :).

        Now, for my selfish motivations. If my +1 meets other +1's the chances of my first DEF CON not being my last DEF CON goes up.</ selfish motivation>
        A start with this is discussing your desire (as you have done) and next steps would involve taking this to FaceBook, Twitter, and other social media to try to get other people to join with this idea.

        When I wrote about sexism above, the claims were not just about some women work in tech/security and have husbands that are not technically inclined at all, but there are also gay men that are married or have sig-o, or polyamorous or polygamist people. Being more inclusive of more people and more groups increases chances more people might participate. Sure, you are able to name something you create what you want, but the names of things can attract or repel people. Your choice of "+1" is probably better for something the "The PlusOne Club" as it could apply to any number of plus-one, and does not specify sex or orientation, but might not be well received among those polyamamourous/polygamist people because of the "one" not explicitly including them. It is hard to please everyone.

        I do not speak for Contests/Events/Villages/Parties goons or departments, but the history of *past* DEF CON has been one of those contests/events/parties/social-gatherings that discriminate or segregate, or restrict attendance are not usually given any kind of official or unofficial support. For example, "QueerCon," has never required anyone be gay, bi, lesbian, or transgendered to attend as a party, and they (the people hosting the party) were vocal in NOT excluding people because they are not GLBT.

        Because of this history, I doubt there will be any DEF CON support for a "women only" party, or a "men only" party or a "$RACE_RELIGION_FAITH_ORIENTATION_ETC only party." From past observations, DEF CON has supported things that are inclusive - things that bring us together over things that divide us with segregation. (For example, at least one year included an NSA table next to an EFF table, and both we able to co-exist at DEF CON without excluding the other.)

        HTH,
        -Cot

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        • #5
          TheCotMan , very well said, I hadn't considered it from that [exclusive] perspective.
          .: This post contains 100% recycled electrons :.

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          • #6
            My wife spends her time reading books at the pool and relaxing. She highly recommends it. Then we watch the latest season of Game of Thrones in the evening. :-)

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