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  • Monkey butlers

    Defcon needs monkey butlers. Specifically, monkey butlers trained to fetch and deliver booze when supplies run low. This would be the best thing evar, and should be implemented post-haste.

  • #2
    Originally posted by skroo
    Defcon needs monkey butlers. Specifically, monkey butlers trained to fetch and deliver booze when supplies run low. This would be the best thing evar, and should be implemented post-haste.
    I agree but haved two questions.
    1) Would I have to tip?
    2) Is this plan PETA approved? I would hate to be sued for demeaning an animal's nature.
    Did Everquest teach you that?

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    • #3
      I got it! Remember in Karate Kid where the teacher made the kid paint his fence, wax the car, and dozens of other chores in turn for learning karate?

      We can do that. Anyone who wants to be l33t and learn to hack will need to be the Monkley Butler for the entire con. Anyone who does that for the duration will earn an AOL CD from me the next year. We need to implement this for the asshats and fucktards. Heaven knows we have enough of them, we need to put them to good use!
      Last edited by astcell; October 31, 2004, 19:52.

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      • #4
        How many monkey butlers will there be?

        I return whatever i wish . Its called FREEDOWM OF RANDOMNESS IN A HECK . CLUSTERED DEFEATED CORn FORUM . Welcome to me

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        • #5
          Originally posted by noid
          How many monkey butlers will there be?
          Two per goon (one for the Rickshaw, the other to fetch alcohol) with the slackers set aside for abuse by forum members.
          The dude abides.

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          • #6
            One at first, but they will train others.
            Aut disce aut discede

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            • #7
              What are the qualifications for Monkey Butler?

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              • #8
                Mojo? What have they done to you?

                pray
                for
                mojo
                Liberty not only means that the individual has both the opportunity and the burden of choice;
                it also means that he must bear the consequences of his actions.
                Liberty and responsibility are inseparable.

                - Friedrich Hayek

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Xodia
                  Two per goon (one for the Rickshaw, the other to fetch alcohol) with the slackers set aside for abuse by forum members.
                  What makes you think some of them won't BE forum members??

                  I claim Twinvega and CK3k as my monkey butlers. While they are neither asshats or fucktards, (or butlers, as far as I know!) I think they would make swell monkey labor. They take my abuse well knowing they will be richly rewarded in the afterlife (or at the forum meet, where I keep homebrew with their names on it). Especially since I have finally trained them on what a decent beer tastes like..

                  Personal whipping boys will be announced later.
                  Last edited by Gadsden; October 31, 2004, 23:08.
                  Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.

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                  • #10
                    an ounce of preparation is worth a pound of cure...

                    This "running out of booze" thing, is that something that happens to you often?

                    I suggest you pay close attention to the boards prior to con when various individuals put together caravans and supply runs to Sams club and the base exchange, usually on Weds/Thurs. While only some resemble monkeys they cannot be held responsible if *you* fail to secure sufficient libation for yourself.
                    That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by che
                      What makes you think some of them won't BE forum members??
                      In that case, Abel is getting a lesson in butlery.
                      The dude abides.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by ndex
                        This "running out of booze" thing, is that something that happens to you often?
                        No, because I have monkey butlers to fetch more.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by astcell
                          I got it! Remember in Karate Kid where the teacher made the kid paint his fence, wax the car, and dozens of other chores in turn for learning karate?

                          We can do that. Anyone who wants to be l33t and learn to hack will need to be the Monkley Butler for the entire con. Anyone who does that for the duration will earn an AOL CD from me the next year. We need to implement this for the asshats and fucktards. Heaven knows we have enough of them, we need to put them to good use!
                          I'll volunteer!!! I wish learning this stuff was that easy. Wait a minute...does it mean I have to ditch AOL?

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Clp727
                            I'll volunteer!!! I wish learning this stuff was that easy. Wait a minute...does it mean I have to ditch AOL?

                            You *can't* ditch AOL, that would be ditching "the internet"- Like in the ads....

                            LosT

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                            • #15
                              I dunno, Skroo...You know where that whole monkey butler stuff leads...

                              "You maniacs! You blew it all up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!"

                              Al
                              "Are my pants...threatening you?"

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