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S O C A L C A R C A R A V A N S O C A L C A R C A R A V A N RESURRECTION EDITION, 2013 S O C A L C A R C A R A V A N >> READ AND DISTRIBUTE AND READ AND DISTRIBUTE AND READ AND DISTRIBUTE << Preliminary Announcement: 02/15/2013 We are proud to announce the reestablishment of the SoCal Car Caravan to Defcon after a decade in abeyance. PEOPLE OF EARTH! If you are reading this, you have been chosen to take part in a glorious motor caravan across the desert wastes to face death, glory, and people with blue hair who may be feds. The Socal Caravan to Defcon returns after a decade of terrible absence. Take part in the event your children's children will be memetically encoded with! WHO: You know who you are - and likely have a car at your disposal. WHAT: Interstate 15 to Las Vegas from Los Angeles. WHERE: Ontario Mills, California WHEN: Wednesday before Defcon. WHY: To make the pilgrimage to the east alongside your fellow technophiles, and maybe make the occasional dick joke over walkie talkies. DESCRIPTION: So you're bored, and have never gone to a convention? You want to collect intel on your fellow technophiles? Travel east with out motley collection of your fellow hackers, phreaks, scions of the illuminati, and tantric sex gods! The Socal Car Caravan convenes at the Ontario Mills mall the Wednesday before the con, there the mighty will join our warhost. Direction will be provided exclusively over desert crossing radio, a fearsome communications station located in the mothership that will guide us into the east. You will arrive in Vegas with many a tale to tell, and even if you do return, you will not be the same as when you left. It will be amazing, we will fight anyone who says otherwise, then they will explode. FINAL NOTES: COST: The caravan is provided at no cost to you. You are required to provide your own vehicle, or find one to ride in. Fuel and food costs are yours to bear as well. Free entertainment will be provided prior to depature as we attempt to array our fellow hackers for launch in a ritual known as "The Herding of the Cats!" TUNES: Your vehicle should be equipped with an FM radio and speakers suitable for listening to it. Desert Crossing Radio on 104.7 FM will be vital to your journey. We have solicited all manner of entertainment for this endeavour. If you have anything you wish to contribute, please post in this thread. FOR MORE INFORMATION: For initial comments, requests for more information, information about driving a car poorly, or maps to where prostitutes can't be seen entering the Rio, post in this thread by using your InterNetBrowsarMaschien. Or Email: socalcarcaravan@gmail.com for caravan information/updates and to leave questions or comments. Or Snail Mail (U.S. Postal Service) it to SoCalCarCaravan, c/o Null Space Labs, 1015 South Main Street, Los Angeles, CA, 90015. Future information updates will pertain to the driving agenda. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Updates since the last caravan: >> The FCC and CHP are too busy to attend. We disavow the associated diversions. >> Top Gear, Pirate Radio Weekly, and Stephen Hawking have stated they will attend. >> We got a forum thread going for comments and questions. Go us! >> We don't have enough $$$ to run the landfortress this year. Sorry. >> A twelve year old screaming "Faggot!" will be representing anonymous and a few other organizations. ++ Desert Crossing Radio will cover the event ++ There won't be anyone handing out awards for participation, but there may be swag ++ Stever will be dragged behind a Smart Car all the way to Las Vegas Don't forget to put stickers representing any of the groups you belong to on your vehicle. We want to see cars in the parking lot displaying all the various groups / people attending. TAKE PRIDE IN YOUR COLORS! (Break out the vinyl cutter and go to town) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ SOCAL CAR CARAVAN [PROPOSED TRAVEL SCHEDULE UPDATED 02.15.2013] Wednesday the 31st of July 3pm, Ontario Mills, California 5pm Begin gathering at Ontario Mills. Near-enough location: 34.073653N, 117.546932W. You'll know how to find your own. 7pm Depart. Head up I-15 North towards Las Vegas. A While Later Stop at In & Out in Barstow. Food and fuel; check your vehicle. An Hour After That Back onto I-15 North. Past That Point Stop at the Chevron in Baker. Last food and fuel break before Las Vegas; Check your vehicle. ARRIVAL Reach the Rio Hotel and Casino. DEFCON DEFCON DEFCON DEFCON DEFCON This itinerary is proposed, and may change as necessary. This is by no means the exact format of The Socal Car Caravan. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ [> SOCAL CAR CARAVAN and Desert Crossing Radio <] Desert Crossing Radio is the official radio station of the SoCal Car Caravan. Broadcasting on 104.7 MHz in FM Stereo, it serves two purposes: one, to be a rolling FCC violation; two, to keep everyone up-to-date as to the caravan's progress. Due to past experience with erroneous departure and stop information being passed around to caravan participants, we really do not want a repeat of that this year. As a result all official caravan-related info will be relayed solely via Desert Crossing Radio on 104.7 FM. Announcements heard anywhere else relating to the caravan should be double-checked against the information being given on Desert Crossing Radio for accuracy. Don't trust what you hear elsewhere - DCR is your sole outlet for caravan info. New for this year: the DCR request line. We'll be accepting requests both by voice and SMS, but have your passenger handle texting - we don't need accidents. If we're feeling frisky, we may even put you on the air. The SMS / voicemail / request line phone number will be announced over the air on DCR 104.7 FM on the day of departure. Traditionally, DCR holds a moment of silence as we pass the Cima Road exit on I-15. This is in remembrance of the Mojave Phone Booth, cruelly removed by Pacific Bell and the National Parks Service because people enjoyed going out to it. The history of the World's Loneliest Phone booth can be found at http://www.deuceofclubs.com/moj/mojave.htm .
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