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It was a dark and stormy night.
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And then I woke up.
People assume that time is a strict progression of cause-and-effect... but actually, from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly... timey-wimey... stuff. I'll tell you what, then: don't...step on any butterflies. What have butterflies ever done to you? Blimey, trying to make an Ood laugh... There was a war. A Time War. The Last Great Time War. My people fought a race called the Daleks, for the sake of all creation. And they lost. We lost. Everyone lost. They're all gone now. My family. My friends. Even that sky.
... and then i stopped drinking.