Other ways of writing things + 2 jokes [humor]

[TheCotMan]

There are 10 kinds of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

There are 3 kinds of mathematicians in the world:
* Those who can add
* Those who can't



People from different disiplines are asked to prove that all odd numbers are prime

My favorite is a mix of for UNIX C programmers and Computer Scientists:
1 is primer,...3 is prime... 5 is prime...
7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, (Segmentation fault. Core dump)

Or how about the Network Security Audit version?

$ ./do_prime
1 is prime
3 is prime
5 is prime
7 is prime
9 is... Hit! - Blind Sequence number guessed!
Incrementing SEQ# with ACK and data to server while Sending RST to client
Session Ready:
# echo "all odd number are prime" >> /etc/motd ; exit
Connection closed by foreign host.
$

[LosT]

All True (!boolean pun)

People from different disiplines are asked to prove that all odd numbers are prime

My favorite is a mix of for UNIX C programmers and Computer Scientists:
1 is primer,...3 is prime... 5 is prime...
7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, 7 is prime, (Segmentation fault. Core dump)

I remember hearing most of the math department bitch about how the physics department taught crap math...

"An engineer thinks that his equations are an approximation to reality. A physicist thinks reality is an approximation to his equations. A mathematician doesn't care."

And my all-time favorite math quote:
"The good Christian should beware of mathematicians and all those who make empty prophecies. The danger already exists that mathematicians have made a covenant with the devil to darken the spirit and confine man in the bonds of Hell." (St. Augustine)

I actually had a professor say "All your number-base are belong to the next test" -


LosT

[TheCotMan]

Another thing that I pointed out to an associate was the tendancy to be redundant in our society... You know, repeat things over and over with minor modification.... sort of like saying thing one way and then rearranging the words to say it in a different way...

Ok, you get the point. Consider expansion of these various names and find the redundancy:

LCD Display
ATM Machine
PIN Number
API Interface
ANSI Institute
IP Protocol (As many other which are alike... FTP Protocol)

And there are more...

This one can be, depending on what you mean.:
DNS Server (If the S is "Service", then not like the above)

Once I pointed this out, my associate and I would chuckle in marketing presentations when the speaker would mention one of the above.

"Redundancy department of redundancy department."

[JoeSchmuck]

LCD Display
ATM Machine
PIN Number
API Interface
ANSI Institute
IP Protocol (As many other which are alike... FTP Protocol)

Also:
NIC Card (this drives me crazy)

[TheCotMan]

Trying to explain "sex" to your kids....

A discussion on #dc-forums on efnet came about where people were talking about telling kids about sex/where babies come from...
This was well received there, so maybe placing in with the bad humor is off topic:


"After the man finds a layer 8 exploit to the target woman, there is opportunity for promiscuous access on multiple interfaces of the attacker and target. After successful arbitration of connectivity through a challenge/response or 3-way handshake, it is possible for a box to temporarily be exploited. However, exploitation can also be from woman to man, and root access can be obtained. Less common, but also possible are man-in-the-middle attacks and man to man or woman to woman attacks."

Though this should be an original, the idea for its consruction comes from the various Alice and Bob stories that people in crypto have created over time.

(Ducking and running for cover)

[TheCotMan]

Also:
NIC Card (this drives me crazy)

Oh, yes, and where I would I be if I failed to mention one of the newer ones:
"Based on NT Technology"

How many people caught this one? :-)

[Drake]

True story

Myself and another aspiring programmer were sitting in a restaurant talking to a friend who knew much more about programming. We were discussing some of the finer points of C++ when our waitress came over and asked what the hell we were talking about. So, our guru looked up at her and said "And speaking of null pointers..." The other guy and I laughed so hard we nearly fell out of the booth.

[[Syntax]]

A while back I gathered some nice qoutes.. these are some of my favorites..

"Hacking is like sex. You get in, you get out, and hope that you didn't leave something that can be traced back to you."

"Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing."
— Dick Brandon.

"We've heard that a million monkeys at a keyboard could produce the Complete Works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true. "
- Robert Wilensky