Stupid thiings you can do at work to get fired

[tekkie]

Gotta love messing with the NOCers. :)

I've designed a number of different automated network systems here at my company. They do a lot of the standard IDS operations you've come to know and love (hate?), plus report on a variety of network conditions. In addition, we also track basically anything any of the NOC staff does.

I had to come up with a way for the NOCers to interface with this system, so I built an IRC bot to report current network conditions and also pretty much everything the NOC does to an IRC channel.

The current NOC staff on the clock sits in this channel, and the CTO and most of the actual network engineers sit in this channel pretty much 24-7.

The fun part of this is that since I designed and built the whole system, I can make the Bot say and do anything I want at anytime.

On my slow days, the Bot may spew out reports such as:

"The NOC is blocking 0.0.0.0/0 as source at the backbone"
"The NOC is removing the BGP configuration from 1.2.3.4"
"The NOC has decided we no longer need OSPF on our network"

Now, imagine you're the NOCer on duty, the CTO and all his buddies are chillin' in the channel, and all of these reports are supposedly about YOU!

[colonwq]

Stupid work tricks

The most evil thing I did:

At a previous job we had one of those beyond annoying type of users. After having a run in too many with him, his computer started crashing all day. Needless to say he was Win9x computer that was not patched for the bitchslap and I had a computer that would slap him every 22 mins or so. Nothing like sitting in the same office as him, watching the command run and hearing him curse as he restarts from a BSOD. .... evil... very evil.

:D

:wq

[Qu|rk]

Needless to say he was Win9x computer that was not patched for the bitchslap

Here we go again.....

1) I hate script kiddie lamers
2) Using a potential infected script kiddie tool at work isnt the brightest idea
3) There's nothing evil about clicking the button and watching something that an accomplished coder wrote for those less knowledgable to exploit an issue an OS... one who more often than not has 0 clue what the program does, other than "exploit a bug" - anyone can download it, it takes common sense not to use it, some appear to lack the very basics of thought processes(general statement)

Quirk the agitated

[colonwq]

Not to return a vent too much but....

1) there are alway lame people.
2) Closest thing to a script kid tool used was at and bash on my Linux computer. The bs program was the unix version and not the more popular Win GUI one.
3) The evil was not about exploiting a stupid bug but in screwing around with a stupid user not smart enough to patch his computer for months after patches are available.

Here we go again.....

1) I hate script kiddie lamers
2) Using a potential infected script kiddie tool at work isnt the brightest idea
3) There's nothing evil about clicking the button and watching something that an accomplished coder wrote for those less knowledgable to exploit an issue an OS... one who more often than not has 0 clue what the program does, other than "exploit a bug" - anyone can download it, it takes common sense not to use it, some appear to lack the very basics of thought processes(general statement)

Quirk the agitated

[Siviak]

where did I put that lighter fluid??

Here we go again.....

please make us all feel like you have been here forever and been forced to deal with this as long as the rest of us have.

1) I hate script kiddie lamers

thank you for makin your voice heard..... we DO score on originality here.

3) There's nothing evil about clicking the button and watching something that an accomplished coder wrote for those less knowledgable to exploit an issue an OS... one who more often than not has 0 clue what the program does, other than "exploit a bug" - anyone can download it, it takes common sense not to use it, some appear to lack the very basics of thought processes(general statement)

Quirk the agitated

1) there are plenty of evil things about clicking buttons... always remember "evil is in the eye's of the person getting schmooed!"

2) do you think that there is anything in your everyday life that you use that you don't fullly understand how it works.. or have enough applicable knowledge about to build one yourself?

3) the basics os thoguht process is something that I just happen to know quite a bit about.. I know that all hacking has to start somewhere... I know that it starts with a seed... I know you are the exception to the rule and you poped out knowing how to "b a 1337 h4x0r" and all but some of us need somewhere to start.. Iknow that of all the people here you are the only one that has never used a "script kiddie tool" but that is a place for many people to start... and sometimes it is just plain easier to have someone else do it (*see also, lazy, me, and/or Social Engineer*) so in closing I would just like to say this "choose to read the forums.. choose to add as you see fit... choose to not be an ass to those not quite as leet as yourself.. and please leave the flaming to the professional's!"

thank you and good day

[ch0l0man]

Ah, yes. But my favorite is still the idiot who put the shotgun shell in place of a burned out fuse in his car and ended up blowing away his left testicle.

r0cketgrl

i believe it was a 22, a shotgun shell wouldnt fit in the car fuse box.

[mage2]

22 cal?

Does anyone watch "Mythbusters"? on TDC? they tested that myth. it turns out that with stock wiring the wire will melt before the bullet is fired. but its .."possible"

Stupid things at work. We had someone plug a Fubar pipeline 50 router into the local network and watched it take all ips. The same person while at work was playing with a disp. camera flash and managed to shock themselves with it more than once. He wanted to make a tazor that was wrist mounted. He wasnt fired but it was amusing. How about while working on a irc server that was having problems I sent out a mass message to everyone on the server. " The Internet is now going down, thank you for your time" all of our dialup,hosting staff and users all recived it about 2 seconds before we shut the server down to move it. I was really popular that day.

[Gadsden]

and please leave the flaming to the professional's!"

We have a professional flamer?

/me waits for someone to take advantage of this shameless set-up..

[Webster]

Does anyone watch "Mythbusters"? on TDC? they tested that myth. it turns out that with stock wiring the wire will melt before the bullet is fired. but its .."possible"

That show is awesome, i like the one where they setup the dummy to piss on the third rail, fortunately its not possible to get electrocuted, seeing that there is not good enough of a conductor in the urine to make a direct connection.

[simple3]

That show is awesome, i like the one where they setup the dummy to piss on the third rail, fortunately its not possible to get electrocuted, seeing that there is not good enough of a conductor in the urine to make a direct connection.

actually they showed that the urine would conduct. you just need to actually make a steady stream of urine, (e.g., kneel down and get about five inches from the rail, then let it rip) don't believe me? Prove me wrong.

--simple3

[Mr. Peabody]

That show is awesome, i like the one where they setup the dummy to piss on the third rail, fortunately its not possible to get electrocuted, seeing that there is not good enough of a conductor in the urine to make a direct connection.

It's not that urine doesn't conduct the electricity, it's the problem with no grounding on the urinator. When I was in college, I exacted a prank on my roomate once by tying several 9v batteries togeather, stashing them in the tank of our toilet, and ran a positive lead into the tank and the negative lead behind the toilet andwoven into our rug in front of the toilet. Finally I wet this line running through the rug. When my unwitting roomate went in to take a piss, he was quite shocked by the result.

[astcell]

How many 9v batteries did you use, a few hundred? Just touching one to your tongue is non-eventful, nevermind any current resistance from clothing or skin.

[Mr. Peabody]

How many 9v batteries did you use, a few hundred? Just touching one to your tongue is non-eventful, nevermind any current resistance from clothing or skin.

current resistance from clothing?? Clothing is an insulator, there is no current resistance. Skin is a terrific conductor of electricity, especially when mositurized. How do you think the electric chair worked? To answer your question, I used 4. If you think this is uneventful, try taking 4 9v batteries, putting the connector caps on them and tying all 4 black and all 4 red wires togeather. Wrap the black wire around your sweaty nuts (if you have any) and piss on the tip of the red wire and tell me how it feels.

[Webster]

actually they showed that the urine would conduct. you just need to actually make a steady stream of urine, (e.g., kneel down and get about five inches from the rail, then let it rip) don't believe me? Prove me wrong.

--simple3

Heh, i wont try to prove you wrong, i meant to add that if you were 'about five inches from the rail, then let it rip' but i figured no one would try that .

[astcell]

Idiot. Current resisitance from clothing yes. Clothing may be the same as a one billion ohm resistor. Even an insulatopr wil become a conductor if enough current is pushed over it.

I contend that standing on one lead of four 9v batteries in series, with the other lead in the toilet, would do nothing noticeable. Four 9v batteries on skin would not be noticed.

Forget it, I don't want to go into details here...those of us who know electronics know you need to go back to school.