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  • Looks like the cat's out of the bag

    New York Daily News - http://www.nydailynews.com
    Nerds make better lovers
    By TRACEY LOMRANTZ
    Thursday, June 9th, 2005

    Christina Aguilera recently traded in piercings for petticoats, apparently making the usual Marilyn Monroe morph. But there's more than meets the eye: Sure, she's blond, buxom and sweet-voiced now, but she's also emulating the classic bombshell in matters of the heart.

    You see, Aguilera's fiance, like Monroe's husband, playwright Arthur Miller, is kind of a geek.

    When Aguilera announced her engagement to smarty-pants music executive Jordan Bratman in February, the 24-year-old pop star demonstrated a tried-and-true dating trick. Geeks have got the goods.

    Bratman, with his scrawny frame and oversize ears, has mastered the music industry at just 26 and is Romeo enough to have stolen Aguilera's heart (as well as inspired her new demure-coquette look).

    "A nerd is an excellent provider and a guy who puts you first," says E. Jean Carroll, Elle magazine's love and sex advice columnist. "He'll turn out to be a great father and a great husband."

    And, she insists that a woman who is willing to stick it out with a nerd and get past his quirks will be handsomely rewarded. "Don't give up on him too fast," she said. "If you stick with him, he's going to turn out to be really great."

    If Hollywood is any indication, then yes, he will. This month, reality TV celebrates geek love with two shows: Ashton Kutcher's "Beauty and the Geek," which pairs braniacs with bimbos for a "social experiment," and the latest installment of "Average Joe," in which a pretty girl woos not-so-studly dudes (airing on June 22).

    On Fox's "The O.C.," the nerdy Seth Cohen (played by Adam Brody) didn't just land the adorable Summer Roberts (Rachel Bilson) on TV - he managed to get the girl in real life, too. Bilson (and her character) managed to look past the slicked-down hair to find the witty guy beneath. Cohen's obsession with comic books? Her character deems it sweet. Brody's nasal drawl? Bilson doesn't seem to mind.

    How can a savvy girl land a geek of her own? Spencer Koppel, a self-proclaimed geek who attends crossword-puzzle tournaments on weekends, has made it easy for girls with their eye on the prize with his "Geek to Geek" dating service, www.gk2gk.com.

    Members can meet and select a perfect mate (guys with screen names like "thinkspecs" and "ivygrad") based on favorite board game and gadget instead of eye color, height and other categories the nerds might be lacking.

    And according to Koppel, the pool is stocked with supreme sci-fi fans and accomplished intellects.

    "I think geeks are more successful. They're happier in the work they do," Koppel said. "And they're pretty faithful people, because they're certainly grateful for anything they have."

    When it comes to the between-the-sheets aspect of the relationship, Carroll agreed that a girl couldn't do much better than a less-than-perfect male specimen. "We've all been to bed with the guy who is worried about what he looks like, checking the mirror before he gets in bed," she said. "The nerd, gloriously, stunningly, perfectly, is into the woman. That right there is very stirring, sexually."

    Tiger's purr-fect

    It seems to be enough for the likes of goddess models and Hollywood A-listers. Tiger Woods has a geek-like drive for a stodgy sport, a fat bank account and Swedish model Elin Nordegren on his arm. David Arquette may not have the body of a Greek god, but he managed to land sexy former Friend Courteney Cox with his goofy humor and mismatched wardrobe.

    For Scott Dennis, a 34-year-old teacher from Cobble Hill, Brooklyn, "geek" and "good guy" are synonymous - and he is both. Although some aspects of his personality make him what he called a "quintessential babe magnet" (former jock, drummer in a rock band), the real qualities that helped him land his girlfriend are the geeky ones.

    "Do I know the difference between a knight and a pawn? Certainly," he says. "Am I familiar with the Four Move Checkmate? Well, maybe I am. ... But the truth is I'm a decent guy with diverse interests who actually offers authenticity in his relationships."

    But to get to that authentic nerd, chic women have to be willing to embrace their own inner geek and accept the guy for who he is, chess trophies and all. The caveat to mating with a geek, as some dating experts see it, is coming to terms with his less-than-studly looks and less-than-suave demeanor. All thoughts of embarrassment have to go out the window.

    Andrea Lavinthal, who co-authored (with Jessica Rozler) "The Hookup Handbook," a young woman's guide to navigating the waters of singlehood, says that being sure of your choice of guy is first and foremost.

    "Girls tend to worry about what their friends are going to think," she said, "and you have to get over it. You can't always be making excuses and apologies. Give him the respect he deserves, and don't always be assuming you're better than him."

    She also said that not all girls are ready for a full-on geek relationship right from the start. Her book has a chapter devoted to "The Snufalufagus Hookup," the one that every girl wishes her friends didn't know about, and that she at first tries to deny happened. "In many ways, it's the first foray into the nerdy guy thing," Lavinthal said. "You're attracted to him because he doesn't screw around. Sure, it's fun to make out with the hot bartender, but you're not going to marry him."

    Not falling for the fakes

    Koppel, however, warns that unserious girls who prowl his site looking for a breadwinner should use caution - his members may be geeky, but they sure aren't stupid. "I think geeks are intelligent enough to be wary of the idea that an attractive woman is interested in them," he said. "They aren't as drawn to beauty as they are to intelligence, and wouldn't just accept a ditz."

    It takes the right kind of girl to love a nerd. Kate Hammer, an NYU student, said she's just that kind of girl. "I have been snagged by nerd charms," she said.

    "My ex and I bonded over 'Star Trek,' and on our first date at an amusement park, my current boyfriend impressed me with his intricate understanding of the physics of roller coasters. He's a mechanical engineer."

    For a modern girl who is far from ditzy, the geek could be the mate who brings security and a load of eclectic interests to the relationship. Even the once-naughty Aguilera managed to find a guy who defines devotion and doesn't compete to be the sexiest one in the relationship. Clearly, it's what a girl wants.
    "There are no failed experiments, only more data"

  • #2
    Huey Lewis let us know the truth back in 1986: It's hip to be square.

    As for the posted article, it seems to focus on girls getting geek guys. That seems unfair; geek girls need loving, too!
    Last edited by Voltage Spike; June 9, 2005, 11:33.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Voltage Spike
      <Snip>That seems unfair; geek girls need loving, too!
      Yes, this is very true.

      Just remember geek girls are not attracted to neanderthals*.


      *Note: neanderthals was the base word in which I used to discribe certain male types, in no means was it addressed to offend any real, applied, living, or dead neanderthals.
      "It is difficult not to wonder whether that combination of elements which produces a machine for labor does not create also a soul of sorts, a dull resentful metallic will, which can rebel at times". Pearl S. Buck

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by lil_freak
        Yes, this is very true.

        Just remember geek girls are not attracted to neanderthals*.
        ]
        What about Nerdanderthals?


        Originally posted by Voltage Spike
        Huey Lewis lets us know the truth back in 1986: It's hip to be square.
        Damn you... I will never get that song out of my head now..
        Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Voltage Spike
          Huey Lewis let us know the truth back in 1986: It's hip to be square.
          He predicted the dot-com boom of the 90's.

          As for the posted article, it seems to focus on girls getting geek guys. That seems unfair; geek girls need loving, too!
          They do? Why?

          /me ducks and runs for cover.

          Originally posted by che
          What about Nerdanderthals?
          That is great!

          Comment


          • #6
            Time to get on my blue swead shoes, oh wait, that only applies in Califorina!

            Las Vegas girls are just like "Are you a whale?". I told them I was, but when they asked to be more spacific, I got slapped!

            /me moves BACK to california
            "Never Underestimate the Power of Stupid People in Large Groups"

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by che
              What about Nerdanderthals?
              Che, there is nothing to worry about. You're far from the type of person in which I like to call "nerdanderthal". However below is what I consider a good definition to my meaning of "nerdanderthal".

              Nerdanderthals (nerd an'der thol' s) adj. a newbie computer person who thinks they are a prime nerd and shows/expresses mental idiotic behavor towards the female geek.

              Close to the neanderthal of the early Stone Age, the nerdanderthal is very primitive and needs a good wake up call


              Originally posted by TheCotMan
              They do? Why?
              Yes, we do. Why, Why not?

              /me ducks and runs for cover.
              I don't think that will help much, you'll have to come out of hiding sooner or later
              "It is difficult not to wonder whether that combination of elements which produces a machine for labor does not create also a soul of sorts, a dull resentful metallic will, which can rebel at times". Pearl S. Buck

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by lil_freak
                Yes, we do. Why, Why not?
                Because they aren't guys!
                Did I get the question right? What did I win? ]:>

                I don't think that will help much, you'll have to come out of hiding sooner or later
                Crap. I did not think of that.

                Originally posted by Abby_Normal
                New York Daily News...
                Yeah, this also has a more harmful side to it, in attracting more female scenewhores to show off their social diseases in public.

                But as for the "equal time" issue, perhaps more male scenewhores (gigolo?) will show up to show off their reasons for using penicillin.

                What would happen if they each confused each other for geeks and spawned a new life?

                Comment


                • #9
                  "A nerd is an excellent provider and a guy who puts you first," says E. Jean Carroll, Elle magazine's love and sex advice columnist. "He'll turn out to be a great father and a great husband."
                  Translation, nerds are suckers with fat wallets. Let 'em touch your goodies from time to time and the money will keep flowing.

                  I return whatever i wish . Its called FREEDOWM OF RANDOMNESS IN A HECK . CLUSTERED DEFEATED CORn FORUM . Welcome to me

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by noid
                    Translation, nerds are suckers with fat wallets. Let 'em touch your goodies from time to time and the money will keep flowing.
                    Yeah, found the whole thing a bit offensive.

                    I liked it better when all the stupid husband hunting bimbos kept to the really good looking, abusive asshole types.

                    Not that I think these bimbos are going to be able to swoop in and steal all the geeks, after all, geek men tend to perfer geek women.
                    "There are no failed experiments, only more data"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Abby_Normal
                      Not that I think these bimbos are going to be able to swoop in and steal all the geeks, after all, geek men tend to perfer geek women.
                      I couldn't agree more with that statement.
                      "It is difficult not to wonder whether that combination of elements which produces a machine for labor does not create also a soul of sorts, a dull resentful metallic will, which can rebel at times". Pearl S. Buck

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by noid
                        Translation, nerds are suckers with fat wallets. Let 'em touch your goodies from time to time and the money will keep flowing.
                        I was friends (nothing more) with an exotic dancer who would joke about that. She would joke with things like, "Yeah, I make money because these guys have wives who can't keep their men happy enough to not cheat."
                        She had other interesting things to say too, but her view of being married was the most amusing...."Being married is like a contract where the woman agrees to have sex once in a while and the guy brings home lots of money-- It is like legalized prostitution. Divorce seems to only happen when the sex stops being good, or the money stops coming in."

                        Originally posted by Abby_Normal
                        Not that I think these bimbos are going to be able to swoop in and steal all the geeks, after all, geek men tend to perfer geek women.
                        To some extent. There are geeks/nerds who prefer to be in long term relationships with people who are smart, wise, or educated, but short-term, meaningless, overnight relationships with people who only look sexy are not uncommon.

                        The way I see it, "looks may attract someone, but the brain/mind is what what keeps them."
                        (This does not mean looks are the only way to attract people.)

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Has no one else realized this article is describing the scene whore effect? (Ed: Looks like maybe CotMan did)
                          45 5F E1 04 22 CA 29 C4 93 3F 95 05 2B 79 2A B0
                          45 5F E1 04 22 CA 29 C4 93 3F 95 05 2B 79 2A B1
                          [ redacted ]

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by bascule
                            Has no one else realized this article is describing the scene whore effect? (Ed: Looks like maybe CotMan did)
                            I really wish I would have posted something about that earlier in the thread. (heh-heh) ]:>

                            [Content Added:]
                            When I read it (before clicking reply) I did not see your edit. Dang-it! I was too slow again.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by bascule
                              Has no one else realized this article is describing the scene whore effect? (Ed: Looks like maybe CotMan did)
                              I don't think so as much. Ladies tend to be going towards geeks more nowadays because geeks are slowly becoming more attractive people. I mean really, Vin Diesel is a Dungeons and Dragons geek. Geek is going mainstream without being scenewhorish.
                              The dude abides.

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